Carnies Vs. Circus Freaks

Notin’ cheeses off a carnie more than bein’ associated with onion headed circus freaks. There’re several fundamental differences between the fair minded vendors of games of chance and fairly priced carnival rides than the human cesspool that is circies.
Example:

1. Hygiene; a carnie will wipe after every bowel movement as carnies understand that the smell of clinging terds will drive away the rubes. Now take a big whiff of the guy who sells the circus peanuts. Yep, he’s not just selling peanuts, he’s gottem’ skidded on the inside seat of his drawers.
2. White Slavery; J & B Entertainment Lmt. Inc., who own the Badger Boy Carnival Extravaganza and Hootenanny, with which who I am currently employed, pays a fair wage for a fair days work and all Gyros we can eat. Circuses continually abduct Russian immigrants and French Canadians and force them into slave labor as acrobats and monkey wranglers.
3. Clowns; though B.B.C.E. & H have one clown, Bodo Diddles, who is an even tempered and SOBER clown who genuinely enjoys entertaining. Circus clowns eat children.
4. Bears that ride bicycles; that’s just not right.

Thars’ a few of the things to keep in mind the next time you’re at “The Tub o’ Fun” and you ask the carnie what it’s like to work for the circus. It’ll save ya’ the pain of a rapid fire carnie slappin’.